A Night at the White House

How proud are you to have this pResident represent you as an American after this:



A 'hot mic' joke, a toilet flush, taking credit for OBL's bagging even though we know that Obama hesitated, birther jokes, dog eating gags, Mooch pretending to laugh, calling your Secretary of State a drunkard... inability to pronounce the word conspiracy (no excoriation from the MSM as Bush would've received on that one)...the list goes on and on... How classy.

At least Kimmel went after both sides of the isle:

Quite the Send Off...

With the possibility of the enlightened post 'Arab-Spring' Egypt lowering the marriageable age of girls to 14 and introducing "Farewell Intercourse" legislation, I have copied the Angry White Imam's post regarding the new proposed law that allows a Muslim man to have sex with his dead wife for up to six hours after her passing.

'Cause if you don't laugh, you'll cry.

Ohhhhhhh, shama lama you ding dong infidels. Angry White Imam in the 
house tent! And the AW Imam has got his freaky-deaky on, infidels! Because the Egyptian parliament has declared it is lawful for Muslims to have sex with their dead wives!! And what Muslim doesn’t have dead wives scattered all over the place? Oh, don’t get so self-righteous, you infidel dogs! The law only allows for the Egyptian Muslim man to have sexy time with his dead wife for the first six hours after her death. It’s not like Egyptians are like those savage Saudis, who can legally have sex with their dead wives until they have been dead six and a half hours! Animals!

Egyptians are, of course, the most civilized culture in the world, infidels. I know you agree. That’s why we Egyptians can only have sex with our dead wives for up to six hours after her death. It takes at least one hour to hose the blood off after the stoning, so we Muslim men must work fast if we’re going to get maximum flippy-floppy time in the saddle. And the parliament has enacted a fatwa to ensure that a Muslim man does not exceed his time limit. If an Egyptian Muslim husband has sex with his dead wife for even one minute more than the six hour time limit after her death…his penis will turn into a Jew. I know, it’s a horrible thought, infidels.

And, if dead wife humping wasn’t good enough news, the Egyptian parliament also lowered the minimum age for marriage for young girls to 14!! The Imam would like to see a much lower age. Sadly, Egypt is not as advanced as other Muslim nations that allow the marriage of girls as young as sperm. Also, many Muslim men in Egypt were greatly disappointed that the minimum age to kill young girls married to them remained at 15. Well, it gives us more time to dig the pit and pick only the finest of stones. Because Muslim women deserve only the best!

Before you Jews and infidels cry for the poor Muslim women of Egypt, you should know that the Egypt’s National Council for Women is trying to have the new law overturned. As if, infidels! But Muslim women are creatures of Allah so they are allowed to speak. The National Council for Women said in a released statement:

‘The Egyptian parliament, by allowing husbands to have sex with their many, many dead wives, is marginalising and undermining the status of women would negatively affect the country’s human development.’

After their statement was read, we Imams killed and had sex with them. But not for one minute more than six hours! Allah forbids it…and besides, who wants a Jew for a penis?

To be honest, infidels, Muslim women have never been any better than a sick camel in the sack! Perhaps it is because we cut off their tingly parts when they are young girls. But doing the horizontal jihad with a Muslim woman is about the same whether she’s alive or dead, take it from the Imam. Thank Allah for those sexy goats who can be humped for weeks after their death!

Since Egyptian Muslims are a civilized people, the parliament has also decreed that the Muslim woman can also have sex with her dead husband for up to six hours after his death. If they ever manage to live longer than their husbands…which they don’t! But talk about climbing on top of a stiff! Bwahaha! Shama lama!

So once again, Islam wins and you infidels and Jews lose! Muslims get to enjoy some of life’s little pleasures….marrying children, killing them and then having sex with them. Don’t tell me you’re not envious, infidels! We will both know you are lying!

Since the Imam is so joyous over the new laws, I am going to treat you pigs and dogs to the Dance of the 1000 Imams. I will share with you that this is the song I play for each of my wives before she is stoned to death. They love it! Now, with the new laws and by the grace of Allah, all of my pre-stoning wives will have something to look forward to for at least six hours after her death!

The Most Disturbing Thing You Will See Today:

A bit long, I know, but please do watch:



As the mother of a son who is under evaluation for possible learning and/or behavior issues, I thank God that he has a good teacher that will support him when he has a 'meltdown.' This sickens me beyond my ability to express!

Kudos to this father for being a bulldog for his son!

The distressing follow up.

Is Islam Based on Fiction?

iOTW posts Robert Spencer's question, did Muhammad even exist?

If I Wanted America to Fail:

Hat tip to Alligator and Chicks on the Right.

What's Wrong With This Picture:

Feel free to elucidate in the comment field.

Zo On the 'War on Women'

I love this guy:

Tuesday Mashup

Hey, if Moooochelle can vaycay all the time, Shrillary can live it up, too:

Meanwhile, Bob Beckel is doing it live!



Here is AWD's take on Beckel's belligerence.

I think this graphic is very illustrative of the hypocrisy of the left regarding women and children:

And on a happy note, I will likely get my car back today after work! The poor thing was practically destroyed one month ago today when a bunch of irresponsible dirtbags ran a red light and t-boned me, and then gave me a royal runaround about who had insurance.

Fortunately, the body shop should be done, and we were finally able to track down the person who had liability on the offending vehicle. Their insurance has agreed to front my deductible, so there will be no out-of-pocket! Now all we have to do is discuss lost wages!

I can't wait to see it and shake it down. I'm thinking of calling her the Defiant after this. Heh.

Latest ERB:

I know not many of y'all are a fan of these Epic Rap Battles, but I do think this is pretty good stuff! A little blue language, though:

Leftists: Owning Issues of Race and Sexism

Obama hasn't changed his misogynistic habits... He paid female campaign workers less than male workers, and continues to pay female White House staffers 18% less than male staffers.

Oh, and ladies, if you're a mother who has the ability to choose to stay home with FIVE CHILDREN, you've never worked a day in your life. 'Cause raising children isn't real work, according to leftists.

But Republicans hate women, right?

Oh, and they never, EVER say anything racist... Let Zo explain:

Pat Condell sounds off in an epic fashion, once again:



It couldn't get any better!

Meanwhile, (and sort of connected) AWD reports the ghost of Hitler has a case of BDS! Great satire!

He is Risen!

Have a wonderful Easter, all of my friends!

Walking Dead/ Mad Men

Because I can't do politics, here is a hi-larious satirical mashup:

Steven Crowder Shoots to Kill...

...Idiot leftists!

Relax! RELAX!!!

Street People Law

Unreal, jaw-dropping illogic from the New Black Panthers, aka: racists... And Zo lets them have it!