Wednesday, May 11, 2011


You will now receive a message from you beloved leader: 

It’s called the Personal Localized Alert Network or PLAN. Presidential and local emergency messages as well as Amber Alerts would appear on cell phones equipped with special chips and software.


“The lessons that were reinforced on 9/11 is the importance of getting clear and accurate information to the public during a crisis,” New York City mayor Michael Bloomberg said at a news conference on Tuesday.


The announcement of the new emergency alert system came in the wake of Osama bin Laden's death and an uptick in security and safety concerns around New York City.


For now, the alerts are capable on certain high-end cell phones but starting next year, all cell phones will be required to have the chip that receives alerts.

Be sure to have your mobile devices on your person and on at all times, boys and girls. It's for your own good. 


USA_Admiral said...


Of course you know there will be a fee and a tax incorporated with this bit of governmental control. It will become a flood of junk messages from the government.

This is not why I have a cell phone.

WomanHonorThyself said...

UGH...noooooooooooooooooooo thanku! have a super day my friend!:)

Steve Harkonnen said...

This is insipid. Why NYC? What if the next attack is in Detroit? "Oh, we didn't think that would happen."

PS - update posted on my latest post on my blog.

Brooke said...

USA: I don't have one right now because I left min in my pants and then washed it... Ugh.

Of course, I'm considering not replacing it now!

Angel: You, too.

Steve: NY is the trial balloon. If no one resists too much and all goes well, you will see this mandated everywhere.

They couldn't get 'Digital Angel' past us, so here's the next best thing...

Chuck said...

A tracking chip??

Always On Watch said...

The cell phone plan I have results in my getting billed for text messages.

I don't want Obama running up cell-phone bill with his damned alerts.

Always On Watch said...

Chuck mentioned a tracking chip.

The Nanny State would like nothing better implanted in all of us. Ugh.

beamish said...

As a former employee of a major cell phone service provider that starts with the letter A, I can tell you that there already is a database of where your cell phone is, when and who you called and texted and where you were when you did, and WHAT you texted.

Forewarned is forearmed.

beamish said...

As a purely observational note, both terrorists and protesters in other countries have been rounded up by data mining the cell phone tower identification data embedded in text messages and other file transfers whenever their phone polls the network as recieving the file. Anyone can be pinged with text messages to triangulate their movements (or at least the whereabouts of their cell phone, if it's turned on).

In a cell-tower saturated place like the continental United States, cell phones can be tracked down with an accuracy within around 50 feet.

No, the cell phone company won't tell you where your cell phone is if you lose it or tell the authorities (without a warrant), but they know every time you remove or switch the SIM card in it.

I used to nail cell phone thieves. ;)

Big Brother has a graphic user interface :P

Alligator said...

Beamish hit the nail on the head with tracking ability. A lot of criminal cases are solved by tracking cell phone data. That's fine in that case, but imagine that kind of power in the hands of an unscrupulous, power hungry government. We're about to find out.

Read these kinds of news stories while listening to Aphrodite's Child 666. It'll give you the willies.

Z said...

and good idea on not replacing the cell phone

Mustang said...

I’m not certain I understand the logic of the government’s plan. “ATTENTON: A METEOR IS SPEEDING TOWARD EARTH. WE ANTICIPATE IT WILL HIT WASHINGTON DC IN 3 … 2 ... “ So beyond the comedic relief and satisfaction of realizing that there really is cosmic justice, how does such messaging benefit society?

Speedy G said...

"Another cadena from Hugo Chavez."

A socialist doesn't know what to do unless der leader is constantly telling him what to do. Ever notice how Fidel Castro's speeches used to literally last for HOURS. Hugo's got his own TV studio in the basement at Miraflores so that he can have 24/7 access to every television set in Venezuela (and he actually uses it (cadenas) for hours every week.

PBS needs a some truth in advertising labeling. It's not the Public Broadcasting System (PBS), it's the Socialist Broadcasting Network (SBN).

cube said...

Unbelievable. I think there should be a way to reverse charges on a cell phone text message... you know the way we used to on regular phones.